I am soooooo excited and rejuvenated and proud of myself!!
With all of the energy surrounding the topic of energy in my last blog, I’ve finally registered myself for yoga class again!!
Those of you without children are probably thinking, “Whoopie dee doo, what’s so great about that?”
But those with children will probably know what I’m talking about when I say that registering for a class – for yourself – is a major deal.
My thinking: “I would give anything to go back to yoga. I know I would get some of my energy back. I know I would get better at positive thinking again. I would feel sooooo much better if I went. But I’d have to take a late class because no one would be here to watch the baby. And if I take the late class, I’ll fall asleep and snore during the closing meditation. I won’t get back until 10pm and that’s past my bedtime. Damn, do I have a lot to do. And I wouldn’t see my husband at all. And he never takes classes, so why should I be allowed? He’ll get resentful and we’ll start to argue. And then Baby Lovely will see us argue and get resentful herself. I don’t need to add more stress to my life. I can do yoga later. When she’s twelve. But then I’ll be taking her to dance lessons and riding lessons (gag). And I’ll have to clean all of her leotards and wipe the horse doodie off of her boots so she won’t leave muddy crap-prints all over my nice tile floors. So I’ll never do yoga again. Perhaps when I retire...but then I won’t be able to move a muscle. And yoga class will really mess with my self esteem, because not only will I have to go to class with skinny young flexible people, I’ll also have facial hair. And pregnancy flab that I never got rid of. So I guess I’m just doomed to be fat and spiritually disconnected and out-of-sync with my own physical wisdom for the rest of my life.”
See what I mean?
Of course most of that thinking is utter nonsense – my husband would never resent me for investing time in myself and nurturing my hobbies, in fact he’s absolutely aware that I’m much more pleasant to be around when I feel mentally and physically fit. And nothing says that I have to feel crappy about myself when I’m older – it has all the potential to be a wonderful phase in my life!
I’m also well-aware of what I said yesterday...that the more energetic things I do, the more energy I have...
So I did it. I got lucky enough to find a course at 8pm that still had open spots, in my absolute favorite yoga studio, and the company has even implemented an online booking system that allowed me to reserve a spot and pay for my yoga class without giving me a second to second-guess my decision. I start Monday!!
I am soooo pleased!!
Perhaps – no, DEFINITELY – I am closer to getting back on track with my body, mind, and spirit – you know, the things you tend to lose entirely when you’ve got a baby in the house.
Or a kid who tracks in horse poo.